I’ll be the first to admit that I don’t love sharing the things I treasure most. For instance, when I order dessert, it’s because I intend to eat it. All of it. I do NOT intend to share it with whoever I happen to be sitting by that didn’t order dessert. (This changed forever on 7/9/11 when I promised to always cheerfully share with Wyatt during our wedding ceremony during the promise ceremony.)
Don’t mind if I do.
I dislike sharing the covers. I am a cold person (unless I am exercising, then I sweat a lot…) and when I get in bed, I have a hard time relinquishing the only source of warmth. (Note: I am getting better at this, though it still involves a few moments of Wyatt tugging the covers out from grasp occasionally, and I still cherish those few moments I have in the morning after Wyatt gets up and before I do when I can roll over to Wyatt’s warm side of the bed and make a myself a blanket burrito the way I used to at home.)
Anyway, this week, I have been sharing what I treasure most in this world.
I’ve been sharing him with a game I can’t understand or fully appreciate. I was annoyed when I got home at 3:45 from a long day of volunteer work today, sore and tired from the wear and tear I’ve put on my muscles and joints this week. (See my tweets for more on this…) I wasn’t looking forward to a night of sitting on our hard dining room chairs while Wyatt dominated the couch with the loud noises coming out of the TV. But I did 2 loads of laundry, picked up the living room, bedroom, and kitchen (I do this every day, how does it get so messy??), and made dinner. All while my shins and ankles punished me with every step.
(Side note: Wyatt, my resident soccer expert, says my ankles and shins hurt from running around in soccer cleats for two and a half hours last night. I’ve worn my cleats for soccer for the past month or so with no problem. Does anyone have insight in this area?)
Needless to say, I was pretty gloomy when Wyatt came home. I was happy to see him, of course, but just tired. And I wanted some hot chocolate later on and we were out of milk.
At some point I mentioned wishing we had milk.
And you know what?
Wyatt got his shoes and coat back on and went to get it for me.
I didn’t ask him to do it. In fact, I told him not to go. I could go. I didn’t want to make him get out again. Plus, I knew he wanted to play COD.
But he went anyway.
And you know what?
It was a blessing to me. In fact, I was so pleased by his effort that I got the kitchen all cleaned up after dinner and the dishwasher unloaded and reloaded in the time he was gone. I did NOT have the energy to do that before he left.
I also wrote a rough draft for a freelance assignment I’d been struggling to get started on.
And I’m actually pretty comfortable as I sit on the dining room chair with a blanket under my biscuits.
But the most important change that came about from his little trip to the store?
When I look over at him playing, I can’t help but smile. It’s one of those moments when I simply feel overwhelmed with what I feel for him.
He’s playing video games on the couch, yelling at the TV, which, in turn, is making loud shooting noises, and all those other things I dislike, and I’m sitting over here grinning like a school girl.
All because of a gallon of milk.
But isn’t that what it’s all about? He went out of his way to do something kind and generous for me, and as a result, I’m not guilted or forced to “be okay” with a night of video games, I’m actually okay with it. In fact, I’m blessed by it.
A special verse for me has always been John 15:13, “Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.” And yes, I think Wyatt and I have laid down our lives for each other. We’ve committed to putting each other first, laying down the things in our life that don’t bless and grow our relationship.
And tonight, this verse looked like him laying down the controller, even if only for a few minutes.
Learning to live together in marriage is hard. Before, I wasn’t around when he played video games. He did that on his own time, not time when we were together. Now that all our time is together time, we have to learn to find a balance. It’s so important that he doesn’t stop doing things he enjoys just because I dislike them. (And vice versa, of course.) Will he eventually care less about video games when we have kids to worry about and more stuff to deal with and focus on? Probably. But for now, he’s enjoying himself. He has his headset on, playing with friends he doesn’t get to see nearly as often as we’d like, and they’re having fun just being boys. He’s happy.
And you know what?
I am too. I guess it all goes back to that Happy wife, happy life, thing?
Oh, and I’ll keep listening to this…