As we were getting ready for bed last night, (I feel a lot of our post-worthy moments are from that time of night) I was feeling a little bummed out. I think because I was thinking about another week beginning with no job, not even close. And we were talking about this coming weekend.
I’m so excited for a good friend’s wedding on Saturday that I get to be a part of, but for some reason, I was just a little down. As I sorted out my feelings to determine the cause of my gloom, I admitted to Wyatt that I think I was just missing the fact that my wedding day was over. Forever.
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t at all want to go backwards. I’m so happy to be married, and in order to be married, the wedding day has to be over. I loved our wedding, and I couldn’t have asked for it to be a better day. I have no regrets and no hard feelings. Still, I think it’s natural to reminisce about the happiest day of our lives. Which is fine, as long as you don’t obsess or start to get stuck in this gloomy sort of mood.
And that thought, that our wedding day was the happiest day of my life, is what made me start to think about why I was feeling a little bummed out. The thought that not every day of our lives will be a “big day.” Our next big day won’t be until the birth of a child, or when we find out we’re expecting, or buying a new house.
And while I was in the middle of figuring out how to feel about that, Wyatt simply and quietly interrupted my thoughts and said, “but you can’t just look forward to all the big days, you have to live all the little days happening right now.”
Ok, he gets the award for both the sweetest and most practical pep talk.
And he’s right. I don’t want to be bummed out thinking about how great one day in our past was, or how great one day in our future will be.
To be honest, I think that’s something I’ve always struggled with. I’m super “goal-oriented” and looking forward to exciting things to come is what got me through three jam-packed, fast-forwarded years of college. But now that I’m here, living the part of my life that I’ve always looked forward to, I don’t want to miss a single moment.
So this weekend we’ll celebrate a friend’s “big day,” and celebrate the fact that we’re in this stage of “little days” where we can just relax and enjoy our little family in our little apartment.
Because bigger things are coming, and someday, we’ll have our hands full of “big stuff.” Or if Wyatt gets his way, two little-boy-bundles of “little stuff.”