I haven’t had one of these “Please help!” posts in a while. Maybe because we’re feeling more settled in our marriage and we don’t have as many moments that leave us thinking, “I wonder how other people figure this stuff out…” Or maybe because life has been so crazy focused on our house and work that we haven’t had a lot of time to really dig deep in these marriage issues that sometimes come up.
As I write this, Hubs is still not home from work on a Friday night. He’s worked long hours all week. And all last week. And the week before that.
We were gone all last week because he had to work out of town. I went with him hoping to spend some quality time together during the evenings and on the weekends, but even that time was mostly filled with him responding to emails, finishing projects on his laptop while I read, or him needing to go to bed early so he could get up early and do it all over again the next day.
I love that he loves his job. And I’m so thankful he can do something he enjoys (mostly!) to support our little family and help us have this beautiful home we love.
I even like that he sometimes has work to do at home. I don’t mind reading quietly or working on projects of my own for an hour or so of an evening if he has work to do. It’s nice to be able to sit quietly with our own projects and still just be there with each other.
But I’m at a loss as to what to do to help him relax when he comes home and has time to unplug from the day or week he’s had.
Don’t get me wrong, we still enjoy our evenings together, but lately, I can tell work’s been on his mind more than before. I know every job is a different situation and there are certain times when we need to be accessible by email and phone. But I’m just wondering how we decide what things are “work-free” zones and how to best really commit to being present in those moments when work is always in the back of our mind?
So, friends, tell me, what are your best tips for helping your honey relax when he can’t stop thinking about work? And how do you find the balance between work and play and time at home?